Friday, January 14, 2011

Dear Trolls,

I'm certain you are aware of who you are and for those of you that are unaware, denial is the first step, please seek help.  Internet trolling is a personality disorder, caused in theory by lack of social interactions, a lack of motherly love (she may have been busy "loving" on me...) and a severe need for attention.

I'm sure it is a sad life of cheap, shortly lived humor.  And there can be no doubt the shame you feel, while trying to appear intelligent only to fail miserably, is deep.

As for those of you who are saying "What to you mean?  Its endless fun and I have lots of smart!"..... it truly is pitiful that you can not see the error of your ways.


Ok, so that's probably feeding the trolls.  Oh well.  In truth, if I ever got my hands on some of the trolls I've had to deal with in the past I'd set their faces on fire and put it out with a fork (favorite hobby of mine), or I'd pierce all their nipples, string them together and call them the Chain Gang and have them sing show tunes in their underwear while trying to do the Macarena and the Show Girls leg kick dance thing, all while still being strung together, mind you, and if one or two of them got their nips ripped off, well that would be their own fault for not all moving in unison.  Also, they would all call me The Almighty Mistress and I'd whip them twice daily and they would NOT like it, but they will not bitch because I am the Almighty Mistress, and I'd make them watch movies of me doing their mom's like the dirty whores they are and they will NOT like it, but they will because I am the Almighty Mistress, and...I think you get the point now...

And you all don't have to call me the Almighty Mistress, thats for the Trolls.  You can stick with Grand Poobah!

'Til later my lovelies! 


CB said...

You are making me feel like a dirty whore thinking about calling you 'The Almighty Mistress'...

In a completely different sense of course, because I am not a troll.

Brandy Rose said...

It has a completely different ring when you say it CB. ;)